Lil' ToS BETA VERSION
by Doctor Munkey
Summary: A Crazy TOTALYINYOURFACE story about the ToS cast members as fifth graders. Most of them anyway. Written in difrent style than regular. Pop culture references, and swearing. It's like a family guy episode, but not nearly as funny.
1. Chapter 1 :The non Aggresion Treaty

Hi. I don't own any of the trademarked characters in fic. If I did, the various video games, movies, TV shows, and books they were in would be completely different. Also, any names or similarities to celebrities in this fic are entirely coincidental. If you're still reading this than you are not giving the below fic your full attention. Read it now.

**Chapter 1, the non-aggression treaty.**

"Dwarven vow number 78, if you're late for school one more goddamn time, I won't let ye' urinate on Forcystus's house on the way to school!" To Lloyd Irving, this was like saying that that he had been grounded, or worse: banned from stabbing dangerous animals through the eyes with his wooden swords.

Lloyd was getting ready to go out the door when he realized that he had forgotten to take his pajamas off. By the time he had ran upstairs to change; he was already going to be late for class.

"Oh well," Lloyd sighed to himself "looks like I'll have to wait till schools over before I can find some new and twisted way of pissing Forcystus off.

Joseph Forcystus, or "Lord" Forcystus to his few friends, was one of the typical assholes that went to Iselia Elementary. He was greatly disliked by a good eighty percent of the class, and always deemed everyone who wasn't a half elf "inferior". Lloyd and he had been mortal enemies since the day they met back in first grade. Ever since, Lloyd had gone out of his way to find some sort of new and humiliating way to prank Forcystus. Urinating on Forcystus's house on the way to school was just a normal routine to Lloyd; like eating breakfast, of brushing his teeth in the morning. Granted, Forcystus had his own reasons for hating Lloyd; some of Lloyd's pranks turned out disastrous. In 2nd grade, Lloyd caused Forcystus to lose an eye in science class, and three months ago, Lloyd was playing around with Genis's Kedama and accidentally turned Forcystus's arm into a cobra. It had to be amputated. One the bright side, he could have had in replaced with anything he wanted, but Forcystus, being the little prick he was, got it replaced with an oversized laser gun.

"Okay class, today we're going to have a pop quiz on spell casting." rang the voice of Professor sage. There was a large groan from the class. "I'm going to ask you to all cast a basic fireball spell on that punching bag in the corner of the room. Zelos, since we all know you're going to find a way to fuck this up, I'm going to ask you ahead of time to leave the room." She continued.

"But-" stammered one boy with long red hair sitting in the back of the class.

"No buts young man." Rain looked like she was in deep thought for a moment. "Come to think of it, Colette, could you be a dear and make sure that Zelos here doesn't do anything stupid, like put dynamite under the principle's chair again?"

"Yes professor" Coellet replied in her usual cheery manner.

"I don't want to stay with her!" Zelos practically screamed, "She's got COOOOOoooooooties".

"Zelos, we're in fifth grade now. We don't believe in the science of cooties anymore." Genis said, with a hint of disgust in his voice.

"My dad died from something Seles called 'too much Shnoo- Shnoo'," Zelos continued "Everyone know Shnoo-Shnoo means .Ummm…. Cooties!"

Genis probably would have embarrassed Zelos so badly at that point he would have to wear a mask to school, but was interrupted by the large double oak wood doors opening, and Lloyd striding in with a wide grin on his face.

"K." Professor Rain said simply. "Lloyd I hope you weren't pissing on Forcystus's house again."

"THAT WAS YOU? :O" Forcystus yelled. "MOM SAID THAT HOMLESS PEOPLE DID THAT IN THE DEAD OF NIGHT!"

"She wasn't saying that last night." Lloyd said, grin still on his face, almost as if had been immobilized that way.

Forcystus was about to shoot Lloyd when Raine told the class to sit down and take the goddamn test. After everyone in the class except for Genis failed like miserable politicians who couldn't get laid on a Friday, Raine dismissed the class for Lunch.

"Hey Coellet! Want to sit with us?" Lloyd called out to Coellet who was busy moping up what appeared to be a sack of blood that she knocked over.

"Don't let the carrier of that horrible disease sit with us!" Zelos stammered with a hint of fear in his voice. "Quite being a dick Zelos." Genis said in a tone colder than Simon Cowell's soul. "That's okay Lloyd!" Coellet said a bit to quickly "I have uhh… things to do…" she said as she started to walk away from the cafeteria.

"HA HA! You got re-ject-t --" Genis couldn't finish the sentence because the northern wall of the cafeteria exploded in a flash of multicolored explosions that shook the whole school. After the smoke cleared, the mayor of Iselia came in riding a T-Rex and sporting a pirate hat.

"Lloyd Irving!" He bellowed in a voice that belonged to James Earl Jones.

"Ye-s-s-s Lord Vader?" Lloyde replied meekly.

"I am using the powers given to me by the townsfolk of Iselia when they voted for me, to make a non-aggression treaty with the self proclaimed handsome sexpot, Lord Forcystus. Hence forth you will no longer be permitted to aggravate him in anyway, anymore." He continued, before proceeding to take several breaths of air that were amplified enough for everyone in the cafeteria to wonder for just a moment why the mayor of their town was speaking in Darth Vader's voice, and ridding a dinosaur.

"Wait… so this is like a restraining order or some shit like that?" Lloyd asked, now with no trace of fear left in his voice.

"Yep. Pretty much." The mayor replied, now in his regular, pompous voice.

Before having his large lizard friend to return through the new air conditioning system they generously provided the school with.

The next four days were a living hell to Lloyd. Forcystus torment Lloyd all he possibly could in such a small time period. After Forcystus turned Genis's Grandmother into some kind of horrible cucumber monster, Lloyd burnt down Forcystus's house.

"Oh man Lloyd. You messed up bad this time." Genis said, still staring up at the large blaze.

"Still, it's pretty cool" Zelos simply said, a majority of his attention devoted to getting the whole fire on tape.

"As long as they don't see our faces, we won't be blamed." Lloyd said, still wearing his mask of Richard Nixon.

" LLOYD! WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO MY HOUSE?" came a voice from behind them?

"Or Not."

END CHAPTER 1. Hoped you enjoyed it. This was my first fic. Next chapter up eventually. ** If you didn't get the futurrama joke, than you obviously haven't watched it. They play it on Adult swim all the time, so I would recommend that you see an episode or two.**


	2. Chapter 2 :Colette

**Chapter 2: **Colette the Chosen

Colette had wished that she could sit with Lloyd at lunch. Unfortunately, Professor sage asked Colette after the test to meet her at 12:10. She hope she wouldn't have to take the test that she was asked to sit out earlier; she couldn't bear to kill anyone again. Last year, she was chanting the incantation for holy song, and had mad a mistake in the chant. The following event could have been described as "One hell of an explosion". They were still looking for some of the bodies. This was also the reason they had to change campuses.

Colette knocked lightly on the door. The door creaked open, and out came a man with reddish-brown hair. He wore purple armor, and had a sword strapped to his belt. He gave Colette one quick glance before walking down the hallway.

"Who as that?" Colette asked the professor as soon as she entered the room.

"That was Mr. Aurion. He's going to be you're new swordsmanship teacher for this year. I'm sure that if our life were a video game, he would be a minor character not worth investigating." Raine replied not looking up from the stack of homework that she was correcting.

"Riiiiiiiggggghhhhhtttttt. That's a weird thing to say." Colette replied still trying to make some sense of what the professor had just said to her. "You err… called me in here earlier about the time that that endless tower thing appeared a few miles from here."

"Oh! Right!" replied Raine, apparently snapping out of her thoughts. "Well the Crucix organization voted unanimously yesterday that you were to be the new chosen."

All Colette had to reply to this was a very out of character "Shit."

"Come now," Raine said now trying to encourage Colette "Being a chosen isn't that bad. Did you know that Zelos is the chosen of Tethe'alla? And look how much respect he gets!"

"I saw Lloyd and Genis put a sack of burning trash and cow feces into his locker" Colette continued.

"Oh… That was them?" Raine asked a bit nervously.

Suddenly, a bright flash of light came from the window.

"Bloody hell." Raine said, getting up from her seat. "Well, looks like some crazy Desian Gang is attacking the Temple. Colette, be a good girl and wait here. Don't knock anything over, don't accidentally kill anyone, hell, don't even _talk _to anyone." Raine continued as she put on some kind of ninja mask, and a pair of night vision goggles. Then she pulled some kind of large firearm out of her desk drawer.

"I'm off." She said in a strangely unrecognizable voice. It was probably the effect of some module in her mask. Then she opened a window, and quickly jumped out of it, hoping from tree to tree at an alarmingly fast rate.

Walking back to the cafeteria, Colette pondered if she should have asked the professor if she had ever been a professional assassin at any given point in her life. Taking a quick glance out the window, she spotted a fat old man… the mayor? In any case, he was ridding on some kind of wingless dragon.

Colette sighed. If she went to the cafeteria now, _she _would be blamed for the large reptile destroying thousands of gal worth of property damage. It looked like there was nothing for her to do but go to the temple and watch Raine laid waste to the desians.

Sheena couldn't remember the amount of years it had been. 7? 8? Corrine couldn't remember either. All Shenna knew was that on this day, an undisclosed amount of years ago, Corrine and Bobby had been born. She was barley out of her diapers when the half-elves at the research institution were looking for a way to create the perfect summon spirit.

Finally, one unnamed square headed professor created it by mixing sugar, spice, everything nice, and a healthy does of viagra in a large bowl. As soon as he added the last ingredient, there was a large explosion. The results were astounding; he managed to create not one, but THREE artificial summon spirits. Well actually just two. The black one (who was now named bobby) ate the blue one. They never did learn his name. In any case, Sheena now took care of two summon spirits. The happy and optimistic Corrine, and the cynical, mean, and all around evil Bobby.

Today was their birthday, but Sheena had no time to throw a party for them. Yesterday, one of Mizuho's spies confirmed that Colette Brunel was Sylverant's new Chosen. This meant that Sheena would have to assassinate Colette, destroy the evidence, and then steal her boyfriend (if she had any. If she didn't, Sheena was of the hook). This had been a Mizuho tradition since the 60's.

Sheena, Corrine and Bobby had been hiding out in a tree for what seemed like the time it took for a new season of "The Sopranos" to come out, when Corrine let out a squeal of excitement.

"Shut up nerd." Bobby replied in a tone that would make any kindergartener run away in terror.

"No! Wait! The chosen is coming! Get ready to play my theme song!" She said hastily. Corrine nodded his head, and pulled out a large boom box he had stashed in the tree.

Just as Colette was approaching, Sheena jumped from the tree and landed in front of Colette. This caused her to stumble backwards leaving her in an extremely vulnerable position.

"Chosen of Sylvarant! Prepare to—WHAT THE FUCK?" Corrine was defiantly _not _playing her theme song. Instead, he was playing some kind of weird song that sounded like it had been taken directly out of a porn movie. Indeed, there was a lot of deep breathing, sleazy saxophone music, and the sound of springs moving up and down.

"Nice Job Fucktard." Bobby said, taking every opportunity to insult his poor brother. "I-I-I didn't mean to bring that C-D!" Corrine stammered, clearly embarrassed.

"I'll forgive you as long as you TURN THAT SHIT OFF!" Sheena yelled up to him.

Sheena turned to face Colette, but the frightened Chosen had already run off, and was no longer in sight.

**END CHAPTER 2. **I know this may be a bit much to ask, but could some people review this? I kinda want to know how I'm doing. Next chapter won't be up for a few days.


	3. Chapter 3 :CRAZY

**Chapter 3: CRAZY**

Colette completely ignored the weird ninja girl, and continued on her way to the temple. Deep down, she didn't want Raine to have all the fun after all. She remembered a time last year when Genis told her that he and Raine had broken up a secret Meltokian drug ring. Colette of course didn't believe him at the time, but after seeing her beloved teacher don a ninja mask and pull that large gun out of her desk drawer… well, Colette didn't know as much about Raine as she thought she did.

About 5 minutes later, Colette had finally reached the outskirts of the temple. She could see small explosions and she could hear the sound of people screaming. Just then, She saw what appeared to be some lighting push a Desian over the edge of the cliff the temple sat behind.

Now, to most people, seeing one's elementary teacher killing Desians in the most brutal fashion ever conceived by humans, elves, or dwarves alike might unnerve them bit. But not Colette Brunel, student at Iselia elementary. Usually, Lloyd and Zelos's antics caused more overall damage than her clumsiness. As Colette made her way up the steps she saw Raine start to burn the pile of desian corpses.

"Hi professor!" Colette said, not at all fazed by the carnage she was standing amidst.

"Colette, I told you to stay back at school. Anyway it doesn't matter now. I was going to bring you here anyway."

"Why?" Colette asked, her attention now on Mr.Aurion who was now walking up the steps to the temple.

"Professor Sage, I saw the smoke from town so I made it up—Oh. Now I know why I could smell burning fat." Kratos said, his attention now on the hideous mound that was once a pile of deceased desians.

"Yeah. It does smell a bit nasty out here. Why did you want me here professor?" Colette asked, now covering her nose with a Batman Begins novelty handkerchief.

"Well remember that flash of light that seemed to reach the school, even though it came from the other side of the building? Well, that means that the oracle is going to appear and give you a pretty red crystal that might or might not ruin you're life."

There was an awkward silence. Crickets took it upon themselves to congregate and make as much noise as possible. After that, they got into a drum circle and started passing around some joint.

"I guess we should go into the temple and get that crystal then …". Colette had wanted to say more, but after witnessing a group of crickets start to smoke large quantities of marijuana, she had kind of lost the ability to think of anything else that might be appropriate to say at the time.

Colette Kratos and Raine made their way to the top of the temple quite easily. They did have to evade a few monsters, and there were these huge golems that they had to kill, but it wasn't anything out of the ordinary for them. They had to do most of the same stuff when they went to the grocery store. That's why everyone in town was in perfect shape.

Colette approached the seal. It looked like a big hot tub to her, and the room probably hadn't been cleaned for a couple thousand years. There was dust everywhere, the place smell like cat shit and there was a small television set sitting in one of the corners that was playing old Gillian's island episodes.

"In order to meet the oracle, you'll need to place your hand on the seal." Raine said, now noticing that Colette was watching the TV.

"Oh! Right!" Colette said, snapping back to reality.

She walked over and firmly put her hand on the pedestal in front of the alter.

As she put her hand on the alter, several neon lights shot from the seal. "Apparently, angels like to go for the biggest entrance they possibly can." Colette thought as she watched the trained elephants do back flips, the fireworks display, and Green Day put on a free concert. After about a half an hour of the most FAN FRIGGIN TASTIC ENTRANCE EVER, Remiel finally decided to show up.

"WHAT UP BITCH?" Remiel said as he floated down from the heavens, and all the other entertainers cleared out of the temple.

"Right… Err… I'm Colette. The new chosen." Colette responded meekly, not expecting Remiel to be such a **crazy gangsta. **

"Okay bitch. This is how we do it. You get up her andz I be givin' you the crystal. You down?" Remial asked while floating to the ground.

"Could you please stop talking like 50 cent? You're not even trying to acted ghetto." Colette said, a tad bit irritated that the angel that was supposed to be her father was acting like a complete moron in front of her teacher and… that other guy.

"I just wanted to be cool…" Remiel said, now talking in his regular voice.

"Just give her the damn crystal." Kratos said. Colette didn't even know he was awake. She was under the impression he was asleep while standing up. She had seen Lloyd do it before in class.

"Fine, fine." Grumbled. "Take the damn crystal and get out of my sight." He continued thrusting the ruby into Colette's hands. "Now If you'll excuse me, I'm going to use the pay check Lord Yggrasil gave me to go and buy some cheap hookers." In a flash of light Remiel disappeared from in front of them.

"Wow Colette. Your dad sucks." Raine said simply.

Four days dragged on. As it turned out, Lloyd wasn't allowed to harm Forcystus in any way. This meant that Forcystus could do anything he wanted to poor Lloyd. Colette was planning on telling his that she was the new chosen, and was planning on saying goodbye to all her friends but… Well, Forcystus was to busy tormenting them for her to have proper conversations with them. Plus, American Idol was on the night before she had to leave. She didn't want to miss that.

All she could hope for now was that she didn't die at the hands of any desian street gang, or that her Angle transformation quest didn't end with her dying horribly.

**END CHAPTER 3.** Yes. I am aware that the past 2 chapters have been less funny than the first. However, The next chapter will be centered on Lloyd Genis and Zelos again, so stay tuned. **IT BAT TIME, SAME BAT CHANNEL.**


	4. Chapter 4 :Regal the Convict

**Note: The Original Idea for a Gangsta style Remiel was originally conceived by ****kafeithekeaton. Search "GAH" on uncyclopedia and you'll see what I'm talking about.**

CHAPTER 4: REGAL THE CONVICT. 

Lloyd bounced a ball against the hard metal ceiling of the desian base. Genis and Zelos sat in the corner playing their individual copies of "Advance wars: Duel strike" that the blue haired captor had given them.

For the sake of advancing the fic, Lloyd was reminiscing on how they had wound up in this shitty predicament to begin with.

After Burning down Lumpy's house, they got kicked out of the village by their dinosaur-ridding mayor. After saying their goodbyes, packing up their stuff, and learning that Colette was the new chosen and had already ditched their sorry asses, they rode Noishe into the Triet Desert where they were taken captive by a weird desian with blue hair.

"I'm gonna drop you like a phat beat!" Zelos said, mimicking one of Jake's god-awful lines. "Awww man!" Cried Genis in dismay. "I can't believe you beat me!"

"Guys… Shouldn't we be like… trying to get out of here?" Lloyd asked weakly.

"You can't." replied a voice from the cell across from them. Lloyd couldn't get a good view of him because the owner of the voice was obscured by shadows that covered his face. "The cell doors may look like metal, but they're backed up by microscopic needles that, upon contact will inject your blood with liquid expheres."

"And… how do you know this?" Lloyd asked the voice.

"Cuz I invented the stuff. Believe me, liquid expheres are more addictive than most illegal drugs. A fiend of mine licked one of the bars once and had to go into rehab for … I dunno, six months? About that time." The voice replied in a naturally casual voice.

"Okay, who the hell are you?" Lloyd asked, a bit annoyed that the guy in the other cell was taking this as if it had happened to him before… then again, maybe it _did _they were in jail after all.

"The names Regal. I'm the owner of the Lezereno Company in Tethe'alla. I'm like freaking Seto Kiba, only… without the suckiness." Regal replied, his face now completely visible to everyone in the other cell.

"So… err…. What are you in for?" Lloyd asked Regal, trying to make conversation.

"Let's see…" Regal said before taking a deep breath. "I stole 3 cars, set fire to the Triet community building, dodged the draft, got into 3 separate high speed chases, stole the church of Martel's charity money, vandalism, and murder."

"Holy crap! You're a fucking psycho!" Lloyd yelled, outraged that he banned from his hometown because he did the village a favor.

"Oh yeah, I also sold viagra to pre-scholars. But I did all that stuff _so_ that I would wind up in here." Regal finished ignoring that Lloyd was completely outraged with him.

"Why?" Lloyd asked. "So that I'd be around when you guys would show up. Being the president of a large company can get boring. Then, right before I was planning on taking over this video game company called Namco, the president tipped me off that you punks would wind up in here about this time. So, I committed all those crimes so that I could be here today. Check it out! I already dug an escape tunnel!" Regal replied as he lifted a floorboard revealing a large and extremely wide tunnel.

"HOLY FUCKAMUWUGUS! HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN HERE?" Lloyd yelled. "HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN IN HERE?"

"Seven Years. I'm like the freaking count of Monte Cristo. Only better." Regal replied with a large grin on his face.

"Only one problem. Our cells are across from each other. I doubt that the guards are just going to let us walk into your cell." Genis said, now looking up from his DS screen.

"Yeah, Umm… You're not going to believe this, but the doors aren't locked." Regal said. And to prove it, he opened his cell door, walked down the hall, and returned 3 minutes later with some kind of huge yellow gun thing.

"What the hell are you guys still doing in you're cell? I figured by now you guys would be down the hole." Regal said upon seeing Lloyd and co still lying around.

"We were waiting for you. You're the criminal mastermind here." Lloyd said, leading the others into the hole.

Sheena had failed miserably and she knew it. She had fused at Corrine and Bobby for not doing their job right. However, deep down she knew that everything was her fault. I mean, come on. Who in their right minds have two small talking fox rat things with Mohawks operate big people machines? Corrine and Bobby were still pretty much just babies. They acted like babies, needed to be treated like babies, hell; they finally learned how to be potty trained six months ago.

Sheena was sporting a traveling clock that she bought in Iselia, along with some night vision goggles. Sheena sighed. She didn't want to kill Colette. After stalking her for a few days, and seeing how nice Colette had been to Raine and Kratos, she wasn't that intent on killing the poor chosen. However, she was forced to if she wanted Tethe'alla to survive.

Sheena pulled a several large tubes out of her backpack. After screwing them together, she silently attached one of her seals to it. One after the other, Corrine and Bobby both crawled into the tubes. There was a small lid at the back that Sheena fastened shut. She held the tube over the edge of the cliff she was hiding behind. Below in the valley, Colette's group had set up camp and was roasting various foods over an open fire. She pointed and aimed the tube at Colette…

"AGENT REFILL. AGENT REFILL DO YOU COPY?" Raine looked up from her book as the static and barley recognizable voice came from a small walkie-talkie set she had kept concealed in case anything came up.

"WE HAVE RESON TO BELIVE THAT YOU'RE GROUP IS BEING STALKED. TAKE EVASIVE COVER IMEDIATLEY. OVER." The voice said from her walkie. Too Late. There was a Bang from outside and the assault had begun.

One Second ago, Colette was enjoying some fried chicken, and a story Kratos was telling her about how he and a couple of his friends once publicly vandalized the mayor of Hemidal's van, and then got kicked out of the village for it. A second later, Kratos and she were being viciously attacked by a couple of little monsters.

"I'm like Arnold friggin' Schwarzenegger only… not the governor of California!" The black dog thing screamed as attacked kratos with a flurry of claw swipes and the uncanny ability to hover in the air for larger periods of time than most falling bodies.

"Oh yeah? Well I'm like the taco bell dog!" The yellow one replied to his companion as he made several attempts to attack Colette's leg.

Suddenly, Raine came running out of her tent, grabbed the black one off of Kratos's head, and drop punted him over a nearby cliff (The same one Sheena was hiding on).

"Holy Crap! They're too strong! Like in DBZ! FULL REATREAT!" The yellow monster said as right before he grabbed Colette's chicken and ran off with it into the night.

**END CHAPTER 4. **Oh my god! I don't have anything to say this time!


	5. Chapter 5: Look mom! I updated!

Authors Note: I can't quite say I'm sorry for not updating since November because… I'm not. I had to save no less than 3 different species of turkey vultures from the ongoing threat of violent video games. Sadly, the last sentence was a complete lie. What I was really doing was playing Maple Story since I'm now addicted to it. I'm a level 31 Spearman on the Broa server. I just wanted to tell that to someone.

**Chapter 5: **

The moon hung overhead as the small group emerged from the tunnel. For some reason, Regal had brought the strange Yellow firearm with him and explained that it was actually a lightning Gun used to assassinate JFK by the illuminati's elite ninja team. Lloyd on other hand wasn't paying any attention to Regal's droning, and was instead more interested with the strange ninja girl and the two rat things that were seemingly hiding from something.

"… And that's why The Question doesn't show his face to anyone. Not even Batman." Regal finished.

"I don't think that he was paying any attention to you." Genis told Regal quietly.

"That's because Lloyd is to busy starring at…" Zelos broke off after seeing what his companion was staring at.

"LLYOD IS STARING AT A GIRL! THEY'VE MANAGED TO BREECH THE TRIET BORDER! Quickly everyone! Put on the Gas masks I gave to you earlier! I also prepared an antidote for the cooties. We'll all take a dose as soon as we get out of the infected area! I have an emergency escape route planned so-" Zelos felt a large slap on the back of his head.

"I always wanted to be on the other end of that." Genis said with a smug expression on his face.

"Did your mom ever tell you you're a little prick?" Zelos asked as his eyes narrowed. Of course, they were hidden under his gas mask.

"Did your mom ever tell you you're a SHUT UP?" Genis replied a bit annoyed with Zelos's behavior.

"Could you guys please just shut it for a sec? I think that ninja is up to something." Lloyd asked his friends as Genis used his kedama to shoot Zelos with a sword made out of thunder.

"Shit! If she hears us she'll probably-" Lloyd turned to face the strange girl. No go. She had most likely spotted them and ran away.

"Nicely done! However, next time we try to get rid of them, I would prefer if the brat didn't shoot me with swords the size of Halley's comet." Zelos said as he removed his mask.

"You know what Zelos?" Genis asked in an all-too-sweet-for-Genis voice.

"Waddaya want?" Zelos asked back, secretly fearing that the diminutive half-elf might shoot him again.

"You're a goddamn idiot." Genis replied in the same voice, though his eyes gave away that he was infuriated. CRAZY infuriated.

"You're just saying that shit because you wanted to get with her! Just like you're pathetic attempts at making passes at my sister." Zelos said, as he turned away from the group.

"H-H-Hey! So what If girls with pink hair turn me on! At least I'm not an immature cootie-phobic." Genis replied, his face now flushed. "Besides, what would you say if you were hitting on girls?"

"Not like it's ever going to happen but I'd probably say…" Zelos stood up to his full height, combed his hair back and said in a voice that sounded pretty deep and impressive for his age "Hey there my cool hunnie, care to take a spin on my new reihard?"

"Girls aren't going to be impressed by that you twit!" Genis croaked.

"Yeah, well it's better that saying things like 'S-Seles you look r-r-really g-g-g-g-g-ood in that hat.'" Zelos said as he did a terrible impersonation of the silver haired half elf, how was now seething with rage.

"Anyway, I wouldn't _ever_ associate myself with the enemy. If I catch the cooties, then I'm as good as dead. Besides, My dad caught the cooties and died from it. I don't plan on going the same way he did." And with that, Zelos turned away and walked over to where Lloyd and Regal were standing.

Lloyd thought that he saw a small gleam of light at the base of the cliff. He had asked Regal if he could see any kind of activity using the snip scope on his LG (short for lightning gun, just so you know), but he cold only spot silhouettes of people, who seemed to be recovering from some kind of attack.

Come to think of it, if there were people down there, he should probably go and help them. After all, he was a hero, and if he helped them, he could put it on his college application as "community service".

After calming Zelos and Genis down, the group made their way down the cliff, As they made their way to the campsite, Lloyd could spot a man who could only be a couple of years older than him, a woman in a disturbingly revealing ninja style, and… Colette?

"Lloyd! I didn't know you were on a journey of regeneration too! Anyway, we got attacked by a couple of fox things earlier, and now we're going to roast marshmallows and tell ghost stories!" Colette said as soon as Lloyd's group reached the camp.

"I'm not on a journey of regeneration! We got kicked out of the village because we errr… well let's just say that Lumpy doesn't have a place to live anymore. " Lloyd replied, not at all embarrassed, remembering the look on Forceystus's face when he discovered that his mansion had been reduced to a pile of fried sludge.

"Lloyd, I hope you're not going to tell me that you burnt Forceystus's house down after the mayor hit you with that non-aggression treaty that would you're fellow classmate to torment you to extremes while all you're complaints were ignored by the people of the village and the other teachers back at the school..." The woman in the stealth suit said, in a voice that Lloyd Genis and Zelos recognized all to well.

"Raine, please tell me that's not you in the suit." Genis said, taken a bit aback. His sister was wearing some kind of huge rubber like assassin suit, and was constantly trying to get the guy with the brownish-red hair's eye. Genis wasn't sure if she knew that he was asleep. Granted, it was a bit hard to tell, because he seemed to be standing.

"Oh. Yeah. The suit… I'm sorry I never told you kids that I'm a professional Assassin, but I figured that if you kids didn't know, I would somehow be protecting you. Since the Bad guys never go after kids who are ignorant an all…" Raine said as she removed her ninja mask that was part of a Halloween costume at wal-mart.

"I guess now that you know my deepest secret, I'll have to tell you kids about how Colette's journey has gone so far."

Raine briefly explained how their journey had gone. Apparently, all that had happened was that two rat things and an inept ninja failed at taking Colette's life twice.

"It looks like the journey is going to be pretty smooth from here on out. No more fighting Desian Leaders, no more dueling Gigantic monsters, and it looks like the seal won't be to hard to get rid of. Eyup. Things are only going to get easier from here." Lloyd thought to himself as he drifted into slumber.


End file.
